I haven’t talked to a guy, let alone had feelings for someone in months. Like I’ve said before I’m golden. I don’t have any extra baggage of any sort, I’m mentally and emotionally prepared, etc. I guess it’s time to put myself back out there. So yeah… From this day forth I declare that I am putting myself back on the market. Yay~
It’s raining and I’m cold. Perfect for cuddling. Seriously.
Release all your anger, cry your eyes out, let your sadness take over your body, let your suffering and stress finally get to you, let your agony and despair bring you to your knees. You’ve been strong for too long, it’s time for me to be strong for you. Let it all go. I’ll be here to pick up all the pieces.
I’m a really hard person to get in contact with. Unless you’re someone I want to talk to or if I just feel like talking in general. Other than that good luck trying to get a hold of me. Forreal.
But he’s flawless in mine.
Not because you’re hot shit or anything amazing. That being the case, shut your shit up and sit your ass down before you embarrass yourself even further.
I usually don’t pay any mind to my dreams. Most of the time I don’t even remember them. For some reason this dream really stood out. I had a bunch of pins pierced into my head. I don’t know what for, but whenever I took one out my ear from whatever side I pulled it out from would fill with liquid. You know that feeling when you go swimming or whatever and water gets trapped in your ear? It was very much like that. With every pin I took out my ears would fill up even more. When I took the last of the pins out blood started flowing from my ears. And that is all I remember. It was quite an odd dream, so I decided to look up what it meant with a dream dictionary and I was quite surprised with what I found out.
I was just surprised when I saw this because I found it all to be true. The head representing mine and the pins representing trying to smooth out a situation or contain it. Lately, I’ve been all up in my head trying to fix everything and what not which is where the blood comes in. I am just exhausted. Mentally and physically. I’m just tired. The ears, everyone comes to me when they need to vent or need advice, my mom, friends, etc. That adds on to me being exhausted because I keep trying to help and fix things when I need to fix myself first.
My ask box is getting flooded with “WHERE DO YOU WATCH THE SECOND EPISODE?!” That being the case, I am nice enough to willingly share the wealth. It’s the first and second episode combined, 46 minutes long, commercial free, in amazing quality, and of course before it is aired on tv. You can thank me now. Enjoy!
Yesterday I found out that the gay boys at my school are scared of me, or rather intimidated. Now I understand why none of them talk to me or look away when I notice them staring. This happens a lot. After having a conversation with a gay boy they’ll say something along the lines of “I can’t believe I was intimidated of you” or “I was too scared to talk to you.” Ask anyone I’m a really easy person to talk to. I don’t understand why people get so intimidated by me when I’m hella cool and chill ._.
- The sluts, whores, and the starving, starving, starving ones.
- The ones that think they run shit.
- The ones that think they’re hot shit.
- The ones that do the most and go into shark mode when they encounter a single gay boy.
- The ones that do the most and go into shark mode when they encounter a gay boy that’s taken (i.e. dumb bitches that don’t know how to count).
- The ones that think they can turn any straight guy gay.
- The attention
Honestly, the list can go on. Shoot, I’m basically a homophobic homo. Stereotypes come about because there’s some truth in it. They’re true and these types of gay boys are just feeding into all those negative stereotypes and misconceptions about gays. I won’t lie, when I first came out I was all about “boys, boys, boys.” I was everything on that list, but I grew out of it after a couple months. I just don’t understand how some people can stick to that. It’s like no bitch, that shit ain’t cute. Get your shit together because not only are you making yourself look bad but you’re making me look bad too. I’m just annoyed of all this fuckery.
Especially when I’m not the least bit interested in you.
I want someone that is spontaneous, adventurous, and totally bonkers. Someone that will catch me off guard and say “Babe… Get ready, we’re driving to LA to get some Guppies” or “Baby, get dressed we’re going to go lollygag in San Francisco.” Someone that can keep me on my toes. I want a fellow adventurer like myself. If you’re all that and a bag of chips you’ve honestly won. You won me over, made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and melted my heart. Forreal.
I guess it’s the new thing.
Because they’re the type of people that mean what they say.
One thing I won’t lie about being jealous of are virgins. Yeah, I’m not a virgin. I lost my virginity when I was 16 and just like everyone else that has lost their virginity it was unexpected, not what I expected, and nothing all that great. I used to regret it, but I learned from my mistake. I fucking got played. Hella bad. I get played all the time when it comes to sex in general. That’s why I stopped all that and it’s almost been a year since I’ve done anything. Although, when it comes to losing my virginity I have no one to really blame other than myself for jumping the gun. I would go back in time and not reply to that text. I would even go back in time to the point where we didn’t know of each others existence and keep it that way. If only. I get so
angry livid when a virgin is so eager to lose their virginity that they’ll just give it up to anyone. You have something that most people wish they had and you’re throwing it away. Seriously, your first time will not come anything close to your whole extravagant perception of how your first time should be. A majority, if not everyone regrets their first time and wished they’d saved it. Just save it for someone that you love. Scratch that, you don’t even have to save it for someone you love. Save it for someone special. In doing so, there will be no regret at all. Trust me.
All the disgusting, ratchet whores get to all the good genuine people first and when these whores are done with them… These good people aren’t so “good” anymore.
Everything seems to be falling into place. Slowly, but surely.